Monthly Archives: January 2016

A Dallas Stripper On Stage With A Giant Ass Snake…..Yup.

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Everyone knows I hate snakes. So obviously I’m not saying I’m turned on right now, but I’m also not not saying I’m turned on right now. Jah feel? This just kinda proves one thing, Women are just devil seductresses. Yea i know, it’s something we kind of already know. If she has a fat enough ass or big enough tits, your judgement gets clouded 100% of the time. I just said i hate snakes. I said it before i clicked on the video. I said it watching the entire video in a trance. I said it after i watched the video. I said it when i watched the video again. And last of all, I said it while sporting at least a half chub the entire time. Maybe the situation would be different if i was in a lap dance stall one on two with her and a snake but all i know is she did naughty sexy stuff with the snake and sure i was a little bit disgusted but i was also turned on enough to probably throw all the money i have at her to make her do more of it. Why? because she knows what she is and knows she can use what she got to make some money off of suckers like me and all these dudes here. And its not just us, you guys reading it too can admit you guys got turned on just a little bit. If it wasn’t when the snake was slithering over her pussy, it was when she was about to deep throat the entire snake. (You think about what she could do to your penis that probably sucks.)

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Have You Ever Been Pinched So Hard You Had Trouble Walking? What About Pinching Someone So Hard That You End Up Going To Jail For 6 Months On Abuse Charges?

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SINGAPORE: A 36-year-old man was sentenced to six months’ jail on Monday (Jan 18), after pleading guilty to ill-treating his seven-year-old stepson in 2014. A second charge of child abuse involving the boy’s four-year-old sister was taken into consideration during his sentencing. The man, a bird net installer, cannot be named to protect the identities of his stepchildren. The court heard that on Aug 5, 2014 at about 9pm, the boy’s stepfather noticed that the 7-year-old was lying in bed playing, instead of sleeping. He decided to ask the boy some mathematics questions and would pinch the boy on his inner thighs when he could not give the right answer. He also slapped his stepson several times on his face. The boy’s mother heard the commotion, but her husband slapped her when she tried to intervene. She was eventually able to calm the boy down and put him in bed. At school the next day, the child’s teacher noticed he had some difficulty walking and had severe bruising on his inner thighs. She sent him to National University Hospital, which alerted the police. The boy's injuries included reddish-purplish bruises measuring 2.5cm by 6cm on his face and 14cm by 13cm on his inner thigh, according to a medical report. In sentencing the accused to six months’ jail, District Judge Ng Peng Hong said the boy was a “vulnerable victim” who needs the court’s protection, and reiterated to the accused that the ill-treatment of a child is a serious offence. The second charge of ill-treatment involving his four-year-old stepdaughter was taken into consideration during sentencing. He was accused of slapping the girl and pinching her armpits multiple times on Feb 7, 2014. The accused could have been jailed up to four years and face a fine of up to S$4,000.

SINGAPORE: A 36-year-old man was sentenced to six months’ jail on Monday (Jan 18), after pleading guilty to ill-treating his seven-year-old stepson in 2014.
A second charge of child abuse involving the boy’s four-year-old sister was taken into consideration during his sentencing. The man, a bird net installer, cannot be named to protect the identities of his stepchildren.
The court heard that on Aug 5, 2014 at about 9pm, the boy’s stepfather noticed that the 7-year-old was lying in bed playing, instead of sleeping. He decided to ask the boy some mathematics questions and would pinch the boy on his inner thighs when he could not give the right answer. He also slapped his stepson several times on his face.
The boy’s mother heard the commotion, but her husband slapped her when she tried to intervene. She was eventually able to calm the boy down and put him in bed.
At school the next day, the child’s teacher noticed he had some difficulty walking and had severe bruising on his inner thighs. She sent him to National University Hospital, which alerted the police.
The boy’s injuries included reddish-purplish bruises measuring 2.5cm by 6cm on his face and 14cm by 13cm on his inner thigh, according to a medical report.
In sentencing the accused to six months’ jail, District Judge Ng Peng Hong said the boy was a “vulnerable victim” who needs the court’s protection, and reiterated to the accused that the ill-treatment of a child is a serious offence.
The second charge of ill-treatment involving his four-year-old stepdaughter was taken into consideration during sentencing. He was accused of slapping the girl and pinching her armpits multiple times on Feb 7, 2014.
The accused could have been jailed up to four years and face a fine of up to S$4,000.

There’s something so vulnerable about the thighs. I was gonna call this kid a cry baby and an exaggerator but the thought of some manic drunk asian father pinching me in my baby soft thighs with one of those sharp pinches makes my asshole clench and my whole lower body seize and flex and tighten up. I dont get the same feeling about being pinched in the calves. Thinking about getting a cute little pinch from a hot girl on my ass would be kind of kinky. But the thighs, that is flat out abuse. I don’t know if it would ever get to the point where you can’t even god damn walk but then I think about this buddy of mine. Giant motherfucker. Like 6 foot 13. One time he went to Disney and after like an hour and a half of walking his thighs apparently chaffed so hard he needed a god damn wheel chair. Think about it. A fully capable tall human being reduced to a handicap all because his thigh’s chaffed. The way he described it you would think someone grabbed his leg and just started whipping his inner thigh with a horse crop, but nope. It was just from walking. If something someone does everyday can reduce someone to a cripple, then pinching alone (along with other abuse shit this dad did) definitely can make it to the point where you can’t walk.

This guys just an abusive scum father, I don’t think that should be a question at all. I would say kids are getting soft these days but this guy off the bat just seems like he pushes it. id give him more than 6 months.

Florida’s Natural With Some Pulp: Jenna

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Her grip isn’t perfect, she can get more support from her left hand if she gets higher to the bore axis especially with glocks, but at least she isn’t going a full blown teacup grip. That would be a major faux pas. Oh and her ass looks great in those white shorts. Definitely no faux pas there.

Follow her on instagram: @jennahocking

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The Cats Are Back Baby! Panthers Win Back To Back Against Last Years Stanley Cup Winner And Finalist

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We’re back baby! Not gonna lie, I was getting nervous for a second. The 12 game win streak needed to end. We were getting out played and out shot towards the tail end of the streak and just won by taking advantage of some lucky opportunities. Once Ekblad got boarded hard in Edmonton my heart sank. That was the moment the streak was gonna end. Win one more and grab a point in OT in Vancouver. Next thing you know we got shut out hard with a 0-6 loss to Calgary. Fall 1-3 to cross town rivals the Lightning while they were on the hottest streak they’ve been on all season climbing their way towards the top of the standings. Edmonton got revenge with a 4-2 win on our own home turf. Luckily with a 3 day resting period in between and a healthy Ekblad back in the line up, we were back. Just peppered Darling with shots in a 4-0 win over defending Stanley Cup champs the Chicago Blackhawks and getting Lu another shut out. Less than 24 hours later Lu strapped on the pads for a night normally meant for Monty but stepped up for a big statement game letting the Atlantic know we’re fighting off any one threatening to take our top spot in the division. We followed the game plan that made us successful, just become offensive monsters getting goals early and never letting up.

Silent 1st period against the Bolts, but the second period was just Panthers feasting time with 4 goals from Huberdeau, Bjugstad, Reilly Smith on a PP, and Vinny Trocheck. All within an 8 minute span we ripped the life out of Tampa. Ballsy move from Quenneville pulling Darling with around 8 minutes left in the 3rd just to try to get some offensive scoring going, but only to be topped by Jon Cooper pulling Bishop with more than 10 minutes left in the 3rd. Cats got a little sloppy in the 3rd giving up a goal on the penalty kill, but good for Campbell who got goals on back to back nights taking the Empty Netter against Tampa. Not gonna lie, it’s nice when Ekblad isn’t the only guy on D to score. Night ended with another win for Lu and the Panthers winning 5-2, winning back to back nights against Stanley Cup finalist with both having sold out crowds, Snap the red hot Lightning’s 7 game win streak, and pushing the gap to 5 points between 1st and 2nd place in the Atlantic. Great weekend overall for Panther Fans.

Coming up next is a game against Toronto tomorrow, which i fully expect coming up with a win, and then we have the All star game break. Now I know Jagr has been pretty against the All star game but all accounts are that he is at least traveling to Nashville to appear. Who knows how much he’ll actually play but people are all whining calling him a cry baby about it. Listen, if you’re 43 years old, playing on a top line, scoring the most goals on a team and have the 2nd most points on a team that’s eagerly pushing to win a Stanley Cup final appearance, You can do whatever the fuck you want. He can tell me he’s gonna spit on me and have sex with my mom for all I care, what ever he needs to keep winning. If you’re 43 and doing as much as him then maybe you have the right to complain but you also don’t have a cup, so really you can’t. Hopefully he plays like 1 minute of 3-on-3 and thats it. Because coming up after the break is what I’ve been waiting for, The Washington Capitals.

I don’t know why or if i’ve ever said this on here but I kinda hate the Capitals. I see A LOT of Caps fans hate on the panthers because of the attendance blah blah blah but in the end, They’ve had a superstar for 10 years now with 0 cups to show for it. Ovechkin’s a monster but still no rings on his finger. Well this year they so far have been consistently the best team in the NHL going 35-8-3 with the league most 73 points. Holtby is 30-5 so far this season. Unbelievable. Last time we played Washington we won 4-1 but it was Gubauer in net for Washington. Well come February 2nd we’re on the road facing the number 1 team, Capitals on the national stage on NBCSN. Haven’t been back to NBC since 2014 where we lost to NJ. Well this is gonna be set to what should be the two top teams in the east battling it out. I need to see Holtby in net. I need the test to see how good we’ll fare and if we do well, hopefully that’s gonna be a look into the Eastern Conference Final because I don’t see Washington missing a step and I don’t think my heart can handle the Panthers not being there this year.

Small side note- A lot of talk about the future of Pirri on this team. I don’t think he’s going anywhere. Gallant scratched him for 3 straight games when the Panthers were on down slump going 0-23 on power plays. I don’t look into it much at all. We obviously have scoring going everywhere but Pirri just has to get hot and itll happen soon. Gallant did the same thing last year and then Pirri was back with 6 goals in 7 games. Towards the end he went on like a 22 point streak in like 25 games. It’ll come back. Don’t see Tallon giving up a guy like him.

 

I Think Deep Down My Buddy Will Become A Rapist

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Okay well let me explain what I got myself into coming up this summer. Aside from pushing dumb blogs out and delivering Chinese food for all these assholes in Davie, my buddy asked if I could be in his 12 minute film exercise as his summer project. Now my boys are my boys, I’ll help them out always. Well this time i might just unfriend him completely. Dude i’ve known and been my best friend for like over 10 years now. His mother a sweetheart and family always welcome me into their home. Just cut them out cold turkey. Why? cause he might be a god damn psychopath.

See he goes to school at Columbia in New York studying film (what an artsy fancy asshole). Guy has always wanted to do film since we were kids. At first the joke was he would always make silent films because he just never wrote dialogue. Well now the joke has become that he’s gonna be a sex addict/rapist and frankly the more and more he writes, i think its less of a joke. The first project he wrote was about a guy who finds out a girl is a slut and like exposes her as a slut and then she sluts out fingering herself like a persons in a panic jamming elevator door buttons. Really weird ending but the rest made sense. Next he decides to write about a guy who’s a landlord in NYC who gets sicker and sicker and then he gets into an argument with his pregnant wife when she says he’s losing it pretty much and yada yada yada, he like goes down on her and like i dont know how to describe it, orally kill the baby through her vagina, and then goes on a Misfits punk dancing spree. Make sense with the whole Misfits song but either way, just weird fucked up sexual depravity. Well here we come a year later and now i got myself involved where I’m playing a sexual rapist who stalks his customers and tries to rape her. What the fuck, Kevin. I keep my promises so I’m gonna do it, but really what the fuck? This isn’t something that i keep to myself either, i tell the kid endlessly that he needs to evaluate his brain just because I don’t want to be associated with a rapist. I’ve watched too much SVU in my life to let that happen. Here I thought I was gonna be in some short film revelation of a comedy or something but nope. I got fucking roped in to playing some depraved Lars Von Trier film. Hoping at some point his class mates just get him expelled from Columbia. Its for his own good, every woman in New York’s, and my self included. Definitely gonna try to get him to see a therapist.

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I Need Taco Bell’s Quesalupa Immediately

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Taco Bell is taking its Chalupas and morphing them with a cheesy concept that’s scheduled to make a national debut after Super Bowl weekend.

The Mexican-ish fast food restaurant is rolling out a new “Quesalupa,” a monstrosity that is part Chalupa and part quesadilla. This beast is highlighted by a pepper jack cheese-stuffed shell, with ground beef, sour cream, shredded lettuce, shredded cheese and diced tomato.

In 2015, Taco Bell tested this thing out in Toledo, Ohio, and it must have been a hit because the new item is releasing nationwide after its 30-second Super Bowl AD spot February 7.

Taco Bell keeps coming hard with these mashups as we’ve seen with their Doritos Locos Tacos, Waffle Tacos and even a Cap’n Crunch delights.
Read more at http://www.foodbeast.com/news/quesalupa-release/#0OIA6DyEb30JdDVL.99

Damn. When I saw the headline i literally let out an “oh fuck.” Literally nipples hard at the thought of getting Taco Bell. Probably my two favorite things at that fine restaurant establishment. The Chalupa is hands down the best thing on the menu. Simple but wild at the same time. all the same great things in a taco, except the taco shell is like biting into a wild texture crunchy soft fried shell thing. Amazing. Next best thing: The Quesadilla. Again, simple. Cheese and chicken, boom. Fold and heat, can rip apart and is tasty and can hold you over. Combine the two together and it makes me laugh at the real Mexican’s eating their basic ass tacos when they could be eating a quesalupa. Can’t wait for the Superbowl to come. Yea I’m gonna wake up early with excitement like a child on Christmas morning and while every has to scramble to make something to bring to a watch party and buy beers, i hope the drive through lines at TB are clear and i might order a hundred of Quesalupas.

Man Tries To Drug A Woman With A Love Potion. Ooops, It’s Actually Poison

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Source- A man's desperate quest for love pushed him to turn to the realm of the magical when he bought some love potion online and used it on woman. The substances he thought would cause her to fall in love with him? Yeah, those turned out to be poison. Wong Fook Hiong has since been sentenced to the maximum fine of $1,500 for negligently endangering life, The Straits Times reports. The married 43-year-old technical support officer had bought two vials of the substance online for $287 and poured them into the water bottle of his target at Ngee Ann Polytechnic last year. On a couple of occasions, the 30-year-old woman drank the horrible concoction, which she found to be of bitter taste. What she drank was actually a mixture of xylazine and haloperidol. Xylazine is a muscle relaxant used in veterinary medicine, inducing effects such as drowsiness, lethargy, disorentation and respiratory depression in humans. Haloperidol on the other hand is used to treat various psychosis, inducing insomnia, agitation, and excessive muscle activity. Hardly symptoms of love. The day that she ingested the concoction, her throat became parched, and she indeed became disoriented and was unable to sleep that night. After a couple more times of the same thing, she decided to catch the culprit and placed her mobile phone at her desk, setting it to video recording mode in January last year. Video footage captured Wong pouring the substance into her bottle of mineral water, shaking it and placing it back. A police report was made the next day, and Wong was arrested. The prosecution sought out the maximum fine, stating it was lucky that the victim was not seriously harmed.

Source- A man’s desperate quest for love pushed him to turn to the realm of the magical when he bought some love potion online and used it on woman.
The substances he thought would cause her to fall in love with him? Yeah, those turned out to be poison.
Wong Fook Hiong has since been sentenced to the maximum fine of $1,500 for negligently endangering life, The Straits Times reports.
The married 43-year-old technical support officer had bought two vials of the substance online for $287 and poured them into the water bottle of his target at Ngee Ann Polytechnic last year. On a couple of occasions, the 30-year-old woman drank the horrible concoction, which she found to be of bitter taste.
What she drank was actually a mixture of xylazine and haloperidol. Xylazine is a muscle relaxant used in veterinary medicine, inducing effects such as drowsiness, lethargy, disorentation and respiratory depression in humans. Haloperidol on the other hand is used to treat various psychosis, inducing insomnia, agitation, and excessive muscle activity. Hardly symptoms of love.
The day that she ingested the concoction, her throat became parched, and she indeed became disoriented and was unable to sleep that night.
After a couple more times of the same thing, she decided to catch the culprit and placed her mobile phone at her desk, setting it to video recording mode in January last year. Video footage captured Wong pouring the substance into her bottle of mineral water, shaking it and placing it back.
A police report was made the next day, and Wong was arrested. The prosecution sought out the maximum fine, stating it was lucky that the victim was not seriously harmed.

Ahhh nothing says romance like taking a muscle relaxer used on animals mixed with drugs used to fight psychosis and inducing muscle spasms! On the real though, there’s no chance he was making her fall in love with him. That’s just a real good excuse when the cops swarm your house arresting you for drugging a woman. “Oh no officer, I drugged her not because i was going to rape her or anything, it’s because i wanted to make her love me,” when in reality he probably was just annoyed by her and tried to kill her. No love but also no attempted murder charges. I mean are you kidding me with these fines? $1500 dollar fine! A normal person probably accumulates more in fines for parking tickets or traffic violation and here’s Wong Fook Hiong paying the same amount for trying to kill a woman. Irresponsible amount to fine someone who probably was on the verge of killing someone. Sure it wouldn’t surprise me that some 43 year old Technical Support guy at some office in Bangkok wants to cheat on his wife to pretty much drug a woman he works with, but it also wouldn’t behoove me to think he’s a 43 year old Technical Support guy at some office in Bangkok and is pissed off at the world and this chick just pissed him off one day and he flipped and tried to poison her. Its all plausible to me and just in case i lose my mind or something and turn to the dark side its an interesting excuse to use If i get arrested for attempted murder/rape/drugging a woman (it wont hold up in court most likely). “No officer, I just made her try to love me.”

-They probably don’t even care about the guy selling fake love potions for $287 made from muscle relaxer and psychotic meds.

Does This Look Like The Face Of A Man Who Stole A $1600 Dollar Dog To Sell For Crack?

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LARGO, FLORIDA — On January 12, 2016, just before 2:00 PM, 38-year-old Wayne Junior Barfield entered All About Puppies located at 7190 Ulmerton Road. The subject left the store shortly afterward; concealing a 9 week old Yorkie puppy. The individual was observed entering an older model, white truck. Barfield was arrested Friday and charged with grand theft. According to the AP, the suspect traded the dog for crack and cash in St. Petersburg. The dog is still missing. The animal has a microchip and veterinarians in the area have been alerted.

LARGO, FLORIDA — On January 12, 2016, just before 2:00 PM, 38-year-old Wayne Junior Barfield entered All About Puppies located at 7190 Ulmerton Road. The subject left the store shortly afterward; concealing a 9 week old Yorkie puppy. The individual was observed entering an older model, white truck.
Barfield was arrested Friday and charged with grand theft. According to the AP, the suspect traded the dog for crack and cash in St. Petersburg. The dog is still missing. The animal has a microchip and veterinarians in the area have been alerted.

There’s a lot of people to blame in this story. If you have a pet shop, how the fuck do you not realize when someone has stolen one of your dog? I mean im completely basing this off of my dog but when my boy was a pup at 9 weeks old, he wasn’t fitting in my pants pocket. Guy was the size of my arm at least. Can’t exactly just chest him and throw a hoodie on with out noticing unless you’re the most dense employee on the planet. Second, how the fuck did he steal it? Now im thinking its like when you walk into pet supermarket and they have them in the boxes with no top for gerbils and hamsters. Did he just pick this guy up and walk away? If you have a puppy over a grand you might want to make sure no one can touch it without permission none the less fleece it right under your nose. Third, hey puppy, try to make some noise or something for me one time man. Let me know you’re getting kidnapped by a crack head. You’re suppose to be born with the instincts to detect when shit ain’t kosher. Pee on him to distract him and give a yelp or something or else you just don’t care enough about living a good life and if that’s how you’re gonna act then be a cat or something else next time. Fourth and final, if you’re a crack dealer, don’t accept puppies as part of your payment. That shit has to be paper every time or else whats next? You’re gonna have bums stealing a million toaster ovens trying to tell you that together they’re worth a few crack rock or you’ll have people bringing you cats for just a quick bump to get them off. 10 crack commandments Number 6: that goddamn credit? Dead it. No DUIs in this business and New Rule Number 6(a): Don’t except puppies either and pay your customer the remaining amount for the puppy.

Taiwanese Guy Gets Ejected Out Of His Car In A Fatal Car Crash

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LINK TO VIDEO HERE

Absolutely vicious. I’m sorry this guy is dead and all but that’s the risk you take when you try to be a bad ass on the road and try to over take vehicles and in a country where there are stereotypes about bad driving.  Don’t understand exactly why he stomped on the brakes and turned right into a shoulder on the high way. If he went right to avoid the driver recording i guess that’s respectable, but just don’t be an asshole trying to over take ever car in the way because you want your little tuner car to be fast or else sometimes you get what’s coming to you. You risk your little hatchback shovel passing you across 3 lanes.

Dolphins Hire Clyde Christensen As New Offensive Coordinator

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ESPN- The Miami Dolphins will hire Clyde Christensen to be their offensive coordinator, a source told ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter. Christensen, who spent 14 seasons with the Indianapolis Colts, will work under rookie head coach Adam Gase in Miami. But Christensen is not expected to call plays for the Dolphins. Gase said last week that he plans to handle play-calling duties after doing so the past three seasons as offensive coordinator with the Chicago Bears and Denver Broncos. "I really enjoy that aspect of putting the game plan together with the offensive staff," Gase said. "So going into this season, that's how we are going to start, with me calling them." Christensen comes to Miami with lofty credentials. He was the Colts' quarterbacks coach the past four seasons and worked with Andrew Luck. He also served three seasons as offensive coordinator with future Hall of Famer Peyton Manning and seven seasons as a wide receiver coach for Indianapolis. The Dolphins (6-10) were ranked 26th in total offense last season and 27th in scoring, averaging 19.4 points per game. Fourth-year quarterback Ryan Tannehill had another inconsistent season. It will be important for Christensen and Gase to make sure Tannehill and the offense trend upward next season.

ESPN- The Miami Dolphins will hire Clyde Christensen to be their offensive coordinator, a source told ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter.
Christensen, who spent 14 seasons with the Indianapolis Colts, will work under rookie head coach Adam Gase in Miami.
But Christensen is not expected to call plays for the Dolphins. Gase said last week that he plans to handle play-calling duties after doing so the past three seasons as offensive coordinator with the Chicago Bears and Denver Broncos.
“I really enjoy that aspect of putting the game plan together with the offensive staff,” Gase said. “So going into this season, that’s how we are going to start, with me calling them.”
Christensen comes to Miami with lofty credentials. He was the Colts’ quarterbacks coach the past four seasons and worked with Andrew Luck. He also served three seasons as offensive coordinator with future Hall of Famer Peyton Manning and seven seasons as a wide receiver coach for Indianapolis.
The Dolphins (6-10) were ranked 26th in total offense last season and 27th in scoring, averaging 19.4 points per game.
Fourth-year quarterback Ryan Tannehill had another inconsistent season. It will be important for Christensen and Gase to make sure Tannehill and the offense trend upward next season.

Yo if you had to take a guess at his age you’d say maybe mid 40’s right? maybe late 40’s in some pictures but he’s 59! Guy turns 60 in like two weeks and looks like he should be visiting his dad in a retirement home, not the one himself to be in the retirement home. The guy just looks like a regular midlife dad. Tom Coughlin is 69, only 9  years older, and looked like he was about to become a mummy that haunts Metlife Stadium for all eternity. He looks like the same age and kinda looks like a rounder face version of Coach Taylor from Friday Night Lights and he’s only 50. Unbelievable.

As for the actual signing. It should be a pretty good one. As said before, the Dolphins want to bring Tannehill to the next level since they’re handing over garbage bags full of money to him with so far a bad season to show for it. Well the guy who developed Andrew Luck is a pretty decent start even though half of this past season he’s had back ups to work with. Aside from that the guys been an assistant HC, WR coach, OC coach, and TE coach. Guy seems pretty well seasoned from Colts. Well hopefully he see’s some potential in Tannehill and can actually turn him into an Alex Smith type QB instead of this mediocre QB/Once WR player that he is now. If all goes accordingly, next year might finally be the year where Tannehill breaks out **fingers crossed**.

Seriously though, can you believe he’s almost 60?