The Head of the CIA Pulling Off The Ethan Hunt Mask Trick In Front of Bush Is Awesome

This is the moment the CIA’s then chief of disguise donned a mask as she spoke to an unsuspecting President George H.W. Bush – before dramatically peeling it off to reveal her true identity to him.

Jonna Mendez, who spent 27 years working for the CIA, was in charge of creating advanced disguises – including masks – for agents to use on undercover missions.

Mendez opted to use one of the convincing masks she had created when she met with President Bush at the White House in the early 1990s.

Photos of that meeting show Mendez sitting across from Bush in the Oval Office as she briefed him on developments in the CIA’s new disguise program.

(Visualize a very long wick burning across the screen with images of a person being shot in the back of his head from an Iranian man. This will make sense later)

We’re in quite the time folks, Political tensions are on the rise. Any wrong move by any country can cause a World War. A wrong bump turns to gunfire and gunfire turns to dropping nuclear bombs. I’m sure in the year 2020 heads of states are probably on their computers trying to communicate with foreign leaders trying to cool heads while rattling the cages of others. Countries are turning to other worlds new outlets to hear the rhetoric and because media is super transparent now a days with social media, we’re gonna reach an all time fever pitch. Its time we do things in the shadows again. Get in under the stealth and guise of the night and impersonation of someone unknown. We need fucking spies. You know why Iran wants to get into a war with us? Well its cause we launched missiles in a drone strike in drones pretty much painted in red, white, and blue and killed, what some people are saying a bad human, but a military leader to their nation regardless (Don’t quote me because i don’t know what im talking about. Ha!)

Everyone saying that Qasem Soleimani is pretty much like The Archduke Franz Ferdinand Carl Ludwig Joseph Maria of Austria, Archduke Franz Ferdinand for short. Saying nations are aligning and some turning on the US. Well maybe if we didn’t have a guy pretty much bragging about it on twitter we wouldn’t have nations playing takesy backsey about Nuclear restrictions. Listen, if Soleimani was a bad dude, then he gotta go. But its how you do it, maybe don’t leave behind a USA Flag that says I did it.

instead imagine if Soleimani was at dinner one night going over war strategies and next thing you know his right hand man enters the room only to see himself standing behind Soleimani with a .22 with a suppressor to the back of his head assassin style. Clip! He reaches for his gun but before he could, a lady of the night uses chloroform on him. His eyes become heavy, he’s quicky falling asleep. As he falls he sees the fake man grab from his neck and pull off the mask of him. Ethan hunt grabs the lady by the waist and pulls her in. A passionate kiss is the last the man sees as he falls asleep. The two are already on motorcycle on their way to Morocco. When the man wakes up he’s in cuffs, detained. Questioned and accused as news media swarms with coverage about the notion that Military leader Qasem Soleimani was assassinated by his own person with evidence of a gun and planted manifesto left on his computer alleging Soleimani was going insane. Ethan reads all about the incident nations away on a newspaper at a cafe. He walks along the cobbled streets of Marrakesh, a baker pushing his bread cart accidentally bumps into Hunt. Apologizing he offers a loaf of bread in return. Ethan’s sympathetic smile turns to a wiser face as he accepts the pumpernickel loaf. The old man continues along as Hunt walks in the opposite direction turns the corner, eating the loaf in pieces revealing a hologram device.

“…..As always, should you or any of your IM Force be caught or killed, the Secretary will disavow any knowledge of your actions. This holodisc will self-destruct in five seconds. Good luck, Ethan.”

Hunt eats a piece of the bread and leaves the rest on the floor for pigeons to feed as he walks away with purpose. Smoke arises from the half eaten bread loaf with a small explosion. Music Cues…….

 

 

Mega Hot Weather Girl Yanet Garcia Got Hacked Early This Morning

Damn. In the hack of all hacks you know there are dumb idiots that fall for banner ads that all end up being Russian spam bots used to rig your ballot votes some how but I’m not gonna lie, i can’t blame them for this one. This chick is MEGA hot and it came from her verified accounts. We’re not talking about the hack that’s used to sell Ray ban sunglasses for 79% off, we’re talking about it uploaded a fake insta-story to a swipe up link, it took over her bio, and a post. oh and shes also MEGA HOT. I’m not saying I fell for it, but what I’ve come to learn is the internet and the world is fulled with dumb people. People that think Big Bang Theory is funny. Middle America, which although a strong probability of being racist against Mexicans, just cant deny that her ass is poppin. I’m not saying you’re not an idiot for falling for a hacked account spam ad, alls I’m saying is when its on her account and she looks like that, I get it.

P.s.- I remember one time scrolling youtube, i came across a video of a grown man eating a burger for the first time. Guy was like early 20’s normal enough looking dude, had never eating a cheeseburger or hamburger in his life ever. I couldnt believe that shit. And even worse is he was disgusted by the idea. What the fuck right? But even worse i scroll through his youtube channel came across a video titled something in the realm of “This viral mexican girl is so beautiful I flew to Mexico to tell her I like her” yada yada yada, he’s the fucking ass hole who dumped her to play Call Of Duty. A Hamburger hating asshole.

 

I didn’t click on any of these because i wouldve been disgusted

Colin Trevorrow Released A Jurassic World Short Film Jurassic World: Battle At Big Rock

 

That was awesome. I was excited as fuck when they brought back the Jurassic Park Franchise. 1-3 were all awesome, but with them bringing it back expectation had to be tempered with the new Jurassic Worlds. 1 was okay. The kids were annoying but the story was good, dinosaurs all awesome. It feels kinda hard to make a bad dinosaur movie because that always gets the blood going….and then Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom came around. JK. Its not that I thought it was awful, I just didn’t like it. We already have a Dinosaur being removed from the island story line that turns into a Dinosaur auction story line, that then decided to tell you that they were cloning humans all the while there’s a story line of a genetically modified Dinosaur that has a built in laser targeting system. That clone shit is kinda weird and not necessary and I find it very insulting now as I look through IMDB and see the clone girl is listed on the cast and BD Wong isn’t. But what ever. I’m past that movie now after seeing Battle At Big Rock. I’m gonna deal with the fact that they contrived the Fallen Kingdom Plot just to bring the dinosaurs off Isla Nublar so they can cause havoc in the US. I’m fine with it.

Now as for this short film itself. Awesome. Perfect short and sweet full of action, full of emotion. Great acting, both the humans and the dinosaurs. It kinda changed directions when the focus of the dinosaurs came to the humans but what this was at first was a CLASSIC internet video “Battle of Kruger.”

 

Just this view of wild untamed animals through the eyes of tourist. Little baby gets preyed on only to find an even bigger animal pops out and gang up on the predator. Awesome. Now that the dinosaurs have invaded human civilization its kind of a blank slate on what can happen. As far as the other previous 4 movies before fallen kingdom all they needed to do to survive is get off the island. Well now the dinosaurs are at your doorstep and that’s an awesome premise i can’t wait to see from Jurassic World 3 (minus the clone girl.)

p.s- I feel like also the short was a great mix of diversity and tolerance of people. Mixed adopted family coming together. Red neck imparting wisdom on a young black girl that ends up saving their lives as opposed to him calling her racist names. Maybe I’m reading too much into that, what ever, we got dinosaurs.

Check In With Known NFL Analyst George RR Martin on How Week 1 Went For His Beloved Giants/Jets

A new season of NFL football has begun, and…

Life is meaningless and full of pain.

The Giants game went more or less as expected.   Saquon was incredible as ever, Eli played well, but OBJ was sorely missed and there was no defense.   Kid QB looked sharp when the game was over, but not sharp enough to be thrown to the wolves next week.   Eli should play.

The Jets collapse was inexcusable.   How the hell could management have let our Pro Bowl kicker walk?  If Sam Darnold is the new Namath, he sure didn’t look like it.

I think another long dark season looms ahead.

((Comments allowed, but ONLY on NFL football))

Poor George RR Martin and all other fans of the New York football teams that don’t play in New York. Getting smashed by the Cowboys AND getting a one point dagger from the Bills. Honestly Why would you root for two stinky franchises. If you’re gonna root for 2, should make them at least 2 good teams. Yeah i get maybe he’s just a New York Sports guy but Id take the Bills over the Jets for sure. They went to 4 straight Super bowls. I think they can still claim that as long as Buffalo still serves wings and people still jump from tables and wear Zubaz pants. But honestly I’m here just waiting to see what Mr. Martin has to say about Sam Darnold being out for the season due to Mono. Was he kissing too many Girls? Guys? we don’t judge around here but just saying that you can be out for possibly 6 weeks from a disease that 15 year olds get from kissing each other just sucks. You got guys that are visiting world renown physicians like Dr. James Andrews about if they can play with their shins bursting out of their legs and then you have the QB who was promised to be a sign of Hope for the New York Jets out for 4 to 6 weeks because of mono. A wild turn of events and I just need it to be eloquently expressed in Blog form from Fantasy Author George R.R. Martin. Pageviews must be through the roof

 

((Comments Allowed, but ONLY on the fact that George R.R. Martin is a New York Giants And Jets Fan))

MoviePass is Officially Dead….I May Have Contributed Heavily To Its Death, But I Did Love It

RIP In Peace.

Movie Pass was such a fascinating era in pop culture. It felt like there was no news of the company when it started but all the news in the world when it started to fail. Had I known earlier of its existence there’s no telling what kinda damage I would’ve done to that company. For the maybe year I had it, I was running quite the racket and definitely contributed to its down fall. Anybody who knows me knows I love a good value scheme and Movie Pass was my favorite one. Sure I saw every movie release that came out. I tried seeing movies a few times because I would fall asleep the first time around. At one point I tried watching the Death of Stalin 5 days in a row because A.) I felt like I was too dumb at the time for foreign political humor and 2.) I would keep on falling asleep during it. None of it mattered because I would get all the tickets for the low price of 9.99 a month. But it wasn’t just about watching movies I haven’t seen or really liked. It was about the Value when it came to Regal Points. No lie I should be treated like a king at my local Regal because of how much I would stop in. Back when it first started I had maybe like 50 points….Now?

Went from like 0 to over half a million all because i would just rack the shit out of points from tickets. There use to be this girl every Sunday working the ticket counter who was just hung over as shit constantly. I would roll through every Sunday while I was out getting lunch. This poor girl wanted nothing to do with waking life to the point where I would buy a ticket, stroll in, check in, get some candy and just walk out and on certain days when she caught me walking out she would freak out thinking she just napped through a 90 minute to 2 hour movie because who on earth would just buy a ticket just to walk out at any point through. Those were the Glory days. It was suppose to be a goal of mine to accumulate enough points to where i could buy out one of the smaller theaters all on free points that earned free tickets. Alas those dreams are long gone.

Sinemia was a small blip that died out officially before MoviePass even did. Fuck them though, they cancelled my account because i watched a movie 3 times. That shit would never have happened with Movie Pass. Sinemia made you financially commit a year and then would hide those facts up front and tell you to go fuck your self and cancel your service with out warning. They wanted you to fail while they flash their smile that says “1 movie a day” and smirk knowing they had more stipulations than the bible has words.

And now its to the point where Regal offers a subscription service. Sure i can see a movie once a day or at least get a ticket once a day, but the value engine just isn’t the same. Moviepass would pay for the full cost of the ticket so I was getting like the full value of points from a ticket. Now it just gives you a free ticket a day. I’m not accruing any points. Feels like i have a basic child’s credit card now. Sure i could make purchases but I’ll never rack up enough sky miles from spending cash on pop corn and soda. Sure it was a failing service. Sure the premise made no sense what so ever from a business stand point. But that didn’t matter. In the Marvel era of movies and in an age where its almost impossible to make a horrible movie, MoviePass was gods gift to man. And while i love the movie, Ill never forget it was Mission Impossible Fallout that pretty much was the first cut that was like taking a broad sword to the throat of an aging dying body that was the financially unstable MoviePass Subscription Service.

Adult Autograph Seekers Are The Worst And Spider-man Absolutely Wont Stand For Them

 

Tom Holland, a Nice guy. Best Live action Spider-man. Super Excited for Far From Home coming out next week.

Do you know how big of a loser you have to be to be an Adult Autograph seeker? I honestly don’t even want to spend much time on it because its been said for years now. Athletes voicing their thoughts when grown men trample kids to get shit signed just to sell on ebay and stuff. The part that is wild is just how little an autograph fetches you in the grand scheme of things. Like is it really worth camping out waiting in a group where you awkwardly stand out because you’re a grown middle age man wearing a baseball hat

in a sea of what seems to be teens who aren’t at the age where they need to have major responsibilities and can have teen heart throbs like Tom Holland. Besides who the fuck actually buys these things? Its 2019. No one wants an autograph, they want picture proof. Video Proof. Infact video proof of Tom Holland defending you from an Adult autograph seeker probably is worth more than any signature. This right here is the high. 31k retweets 218k likes, Even more over multiple tweets and prestigious websites such as TheUglyOrange blogging about it. Signatures aint worth shit pal. Even Tom Hollands and I like the guy.

 

If You’re Gonna Do Wrestling Moves In A Fight, You Better Have The Pageantry To Sell It

Never in my life was I so amped for something only to be let down. Something any guy envisions is getting into a fight like an absolute bad ass and knocking out fools left and right like a Kung-fu flick. Doing all sorts of crazy shit but definitely doing some variation of a wresting move you saw from the 90’s attitude era. The DDT is absolutely one of them. Just being dropped on your skull onto a chair or the Spanish announcers table. Something that will really leave a dent to prove that you gave your opponent at least a grade 2 concussion but instead we got this sad attempt at a DDT.

What the hell happened? Imagine tossing a basketball up in the air expecting it to bounce when it hits the floor but instead it just laid still. Like on a humanity level I’m glad Red Shirt is fine but learn a little pageantry for me one time dude. Flail around, shoot the legs up as if your spine just went into extreme impact. Instead he rubbed his head as if he bumped it against a kitchen counter. That’s not good enough. The other guy isn’t without blame either. Anyone who knows what the DDT is and sees that flat side front end of a car I guarantee you was expecting to drive his head straight through the engine block. Ultimately despite growing out of the wrestling phase that’s why I still respect the fuck out of WWE stars. You gotta be able to sell baby. Take the bumps take the hits. Electrify the crowd. When the guy put him in a head lock getting ready to shatter this guys skull I expected him to point to the crowd and chant to electrify the audience but nope. Just the worst performed DDT.

Im glad this guy enjoyed it though. My guy here was pumped to see a DDT in a real fight. He gets it.