NYDN- A Wisconsin woman has been charged after she reportedly crushed up dog food and sold it as heroin. Megan Meyer, 22, allegedly sold the substance, as well as an aspirin she claimed was painkiller Percocet, to a police informant last month. A criminal complaint indicated Meyer met with a police informant on Nov. 18 and handed over the suspicious substances, Fox 6 News reported. In turn, the informant gave police a Ziploc bag that included “a folded-up piece of aluminum foil and a yellow round pill with no visible markings.” Tests of the substances turned up negative results, according to court documents. When police asked Meyer if she ever sold drugs, she answered that she had “sold some fake stuff” to a man in November. She told officers she was mad at the man because he had stolen a car seat from her, reported WESH.com. Charges have been filed against Meyer for selling imitation controlled substances as well as bail jumping. The bail jumping charges were the result of a deferred conviction agreement on two forgery charges approved in October. Meyer could face more than 15 years in prison if convicted of the charges.
I feel like such a god damn square right now for not knowing what heroin looked like off the bat. When i read the headline at first i thought this chick opened a can of Alpo dog food and assumed that’s what heroin looked like. I don’t know i figured they could just main line the gravy sauce into them and the druggie wouldn’t be any the wiser. Guess I was wrong.
But that’s not the main point. The thing i want to bring up here is that its kinda bullshit that you can go serve up to 15 years for fake drugs right? I mean yea she might’ve called it heroin but all she was selling was dog food. Pet Supermarket moves dog food by the tons and yet Megan Myers over here can get 15 years possibly for it? kinda messed up right? If the guy chooses to treat it like heroin and injects it in between his knuckles then thats his own problem. Caveat Emptor. Let the buyer beware that its not actually heroin and is only just crushed up kibbles and bits. Are we really gonna let a druggy win in court over basic rules of commerce? Fuck that. Let Megan go and for christ sakes someone get back her stolen car seat from the guy.
DailyMail- An 18-month-old Alaskan Malamute is winning thousands of fans online after her owner documented her relationship with her favorite toy. Before Karissa Lerch, 24, from Durham, North Carolina, bought Luca, she had wanted a dog for some time, but couldn’t afford one. Eventually she bought herself a toy wolf from Toys-R-Us to tide her over. Years later, when she was finally able to get a real dog, Karissa was more than happy to offer her plush companion to the eight-week-old Luca. ‘I passed the stuffed animal down to her and she has kept it by her side at all times ever since,’ Karissa wrote on Reddit. ‘It’s her baby. She carries it around everywhere and always has it with her when she goes to bed.’ The toy dog was originally also named Luca, but as that became confusing, the family renamed the plush pop ‘Mr Wolf’. According to Karissa, the toy is ‘definitely not dog durable, but [Luca] is super gentle with it.’
Adorbs. Just all cute as shit and should make girls flutter and go “awwwwwww!!!!!” You know not too long ago my dog did the same with Mr. Zebra, a stuffed toy zebra he use to sleep with untill one day he took a dump in his kennel and ruined it. But that’s not a story that makes chicks uterus go crazy so just stick with the pictures.
MyStatesman- A former Westlake High School math teacher has been arrested after the Travis County sheriff’s office said she developed sexual relationships with two students this year. Haeli Wey, 28, has been charged with two counts of improper relationship with a student, a second-degree felony. She was booked into Travis County Jail on Thursday morning with bail set at $150,000. According to arrest affidavits, one of the two 17-year-old students told authorities that he had sex with Wey about 10 times between August and September after he met her at a student ministry program over the summer and their families became close. She sent him pictures of herself with little or no clothing, according to the affidavit. Sex between the student and Wey stopped after he discovered she went on a hike with the other 17-year-old, the document says. According to the sheriff’s office, Wey sent messages on Instagram on Sept. 24 to the second student, who she had met at a summer camp, about going for a hike at Commons Ford Park. During the hike, they kissed and touched each other, the affidavit says. Wey told the student to delete the Instagram messages she sent him and “don’t let anyone get a hold of ur phone,” according to the affidavit. Two people reported the alleged relationship to authorities, the record shows. As the investigation continued, Wey contacted the first student and asked him “why did you tell them” and called and texted him repeatedly until he responded, the affidavit says. Wey, a district employee since 2013, resigned from the school district in October after Eanes school Superintendent Tom Leonard told parents in a letter that she had sent inappropriate electronic messages to a student. Wey is one of 41 teachers that the Texas Education Agency has investigated for alleged improper student-teacher relationships since Sept. 1. She surrendered her teaching license Tuesday, according to the State Board of Educator Certification. “This incident is shocking and upsetting,” Leonard said in a letter to parents and staff Thursday. “I want to reinforce that this behavior is not tolerated in Eanes ISD. Inappropriate communication and relationships involving teachers and students is unacceptable and, as in this case, against the law. We trust that the justice system, with our continued cooperation, will reinforce this message.”
(The way she spells her name and the look in her eyes just scream crazy sex to me)
Now I know the Ugly Orange is intended for readers 18 or older, but let this be a lesson to you youngsters out there strolling the internet. The world is constantly being flooded by teachers who desperately want to get into the pants of some high school kid whether it be the jock or the cool guy, maybe even a drama nerd or computer geek. There’s a possibility for any one because these teachers who F high school kids are crazy. There’s a very real possibility that theirs something wrong in their brain that just makes them super horny for the kids they teach. But just as that crazy bestowed in her has given you the chance to get your dick sucked by Ms. Wey, you gotta realize that its probably gonna drive her brain to make her go hike in the woods with your classmate and she will probably end up sucking his dick too. Its just how it works. Don’t brag about it to all the kids in class and definitely do not tell the authorities, and don’t get emotionally involved because it will ruin a good thing. She’s not something that’s meant to be kept for yourself. You gotta let the crazy hot ministry teacher run free like a mustang in the wild.
Smoking Gun– A Florida man caught shoplifting two sex toys from a Spencer’s store told police that he had enough money for the items, but was “too embarrassed” to pay for them at the cashier. According to police, Christopher Masters, 32, was in the Vero Beach store Thursday evening when a manager spotted him removing an “Arouz’d screw butt plug” from its packaging. Masters, cops reported, placed the item in his khaki shorts. Masters then allegedly did the same with an “Arouz’d stroker can.” After walking around Spencer’s for a few minutes, Masters (seen at right) exited the business with the purloined anal plug and the “ridged tunnel stroker,” which cops valued at a combined $29.98. Masters, who was collared by store security, “admitted to stealing the screw butt plug and stroker can,” noted police. “Masters further stated that he had enough money on him but he was too embarrassed to pay for them because they were sex toys.” Masters, who is listed as a mechanic in jail records, was charged with shoplifting, a misdemeanor, and booked into the county jail (from which he was later released on bond). A police report does not indicate whether the sex toys were seized as evidence.
I’m gonna try to help out Masters here and say that its not entirely his fault stealing a butt plug that’s pretty much just a dildo and a pocket pussy from Spencer’s. Why? because its fucking Spencer’s. One of the more revered stores in the mall. That place is strictly for high schoolers to buy gag gifts or bring your girlfriend to look at the sex stuff and convince her to try BJs and anal. But no chance any guy actually buys the sex toys from there. Its society’s fault. You can’t just casually bring a twisted dildo up to the checkout counter in a crowded mall where everyone is shopping for sweaters and eating shitty mall food court food and pretend that you’re just making a casual purchase. You gotta buy sex toys at a sex shop where people can’t judge you because almost everyone there is fucked up sexually already. No ones gonna judge you for buying a butt plug. Why? because there’s a strong chance the next person walking into the store is looking for an even large butt plug because the 1st one they got wore out a few weeks ago and now they need a bigger one to get off. You gotta find your self a shitty run down Sex shop in some strip mall that is always brightly lit when you walk in and porn covering the walls all over. The Lions Den on 95, Hustler on Sunrise, Premier Couples on OBT any of those big sex shops are fine. If not that then its 2015 and Amazon prime that butt plug right to your front door. Skip all that worrying about judging eyes and order sex toys from Adam & Eve. You Live and learn, Kid. You live and learn.
P.s- Why does it look like he’s wearing a barbers gown thing? Probably because he’s wearing one of those crude r-rated t-shirts that they sell at Spencers. I dont know how old this guy is but you just shouldn’t even go into a Spencers past like 19. Grow up bro.
Now its been awhile since I’ve watched wrestling and even longer since I’ve played any of the video games, but do you remember when you could make your own character you obviously had to give him the spear as one of his moves. The Rock did it, Goldberg, all the greats had a good spear in their repertoire. The only problem was the actual look of the spear. You could do the very basic one where the character slowly dives into the guys abdomen but that wasn’t good enough. You needed the ones like the The Rock where you flew at mach speed into the person and they folded up like a binder and brought their spine into the canvas. Well thats what we had here in this rugby match. A spear worthy of sending an opponent through those cheap ply wood table or the spanish announcers table. There was no breaking the 3 count on that one because he was probably dead. His rib cage/internal organs/mental psyche just left his body and went straight into the ground. Ruthless but such a beautiful hit.
P.s- the problem with this is when ever I make a post relating to wrestling i spend hours watching old WWF footage. I was gonna blog this at 11 am and its 2:30 pm right now and I might’ve hit the end of youtube searching for WWF videos.
P.P.S- I give the guy probs for holding onto the ball all the way through the hit. Good chance I would’ve thrown the ball and ran for my life screaming if i saw that guy accelerating towards me
Poor Froggan. Falling for the same teleportation trick twice in a row in what is probably the biggest video game tournament in his life. Guy probably can’t sleep at night because he’s perpetually haunted by by Doublelift’s face. He had good sportsmanship the 1st time around, I’ll give him that. He was just shocked by the play when he threw that snowball and ended up being obliterated. The crowd was shocked, he was shocked, even Doublelift was shocked. I mean the timing on the spells had to be perfect for that to happen. Amazing. You’d think he learn from the same mistake thought right? Wrong. If its Seahawks Patriots superbowl again this year and Seattle throws a fatal pick when they should’ve ran the ball right at the end and end up shooting themselves in the foot, thats what he had here. Just making the same old mistakes. Can’t blame Doublelift for that. You chose the snowball, now deal with the consequence of being the loser.
P.s- I had no idea how any of this works but its exciting to watch nerds dominate and die in horrible fashion. I don’t know if i can go to any of these type events because I’m afraid i wont fit in and look like a n00b. But if anyone wants an actual understanding of what happened i guess this guy had the answer.
Look I’m hardly ever on board with anything out of Japan. They live in a sexually repressed society which forces them to do very weird fetish sex stuff that im not on board with. But I guess the one area we can share a small bond with is the disdain for drone show offs. I wish i had one honestly so I can just net drones out of no where. You want to show off by flying your thousand dollar toy around my face to show off how cool it is and to see everyones reactions watching you fly that bitch? Fine. Im gonna come in with this bad ass Drone stopper 3000. Might even practice on it so i can do tricks like slam your shit on the ground right in your face. The only drone i want is the one that stomps the shit out of your drone when you get in my face with it.
P.s- Nets. Seriously such a primitive tool but so complicated at the same time. I’m pretty sure it would take an animal all of its energy trying to get out of a net trap. Maybe the military needs to invest more in nets. Seriously I’d love to see ISIS getting bundled in some camo netting and jsut watch them squirm their way out while we roll up in humvees and toss their ass in Guantanamo.
So today I guess Ekblad took a trip to NHL studios and they set him up with a little periscope Q+A. Now normally I would skip these over, but not when it comes to my guy Aaron Ekblad. Now I had been under the assumption all along he was still with Claude Lemieux’s daughter, Claudia. Well I tuned in and boy did my ears perk up when he said he didn’t have a girlfriend. My mans on the open market! Mind went racing. Maybe I’ll hit up downtown Ft. Laudy more? Guy with that good looks has to be hitting up the town right? I can see him and Smith cruising Las Olas looking for tail. But that sounds so superficial. Yea obviously he’s a good looking dude. Guy has swedish blood in him, he was genetically predetermined to look like a model. But guess what? Ekblad is a genius too. I mean did you hear him slip it in a half way through that he was taking courses at Harvard(Yea he didn’t finish any but the fact that he’s trying is like probably the equivalent of getting a Masters at FSU)? Get out of here, Dominic Moore. You aint the only Harvard Alum in the NHL. My boy Aaron Ekblad is a learned man of higher education. So lets break it down: Professional Ice Hockey Defense Man in the NHL, who lives in a condo in Fort Lauderdale (i think) who makes millions, dabbles as a male model for John Varvatos, makes millions, is single, studies at the prestigious Ivy League Harvard University, is of swedish heritage and only NINETEEN years old. My god if i was a woman. I would just whore it out at BB&T with a giant billboard sign off I-75 asking Aaron to please come take me. Might even do it as a guy.
P.s- He could also play baseball at a professional level im pretty sure. Pretty sure that ground ball would’ve slipped Jeter’s glove and I’m pretty sure he hit that second one busted through the studio. Without cleats too.
Double P.S- According to George Richards, we got some details into the new jersey. Link to it here but let me give you the gist. Lot less blue, more red, and deeper gold with maybe a head logo of the Panthers. Gonna have a look similar to the Habs. I’m curious. Gonna be the biggest change since the franchise started and some players apparently think its cool so I’m on board. Kinda thinking with the red and gold it’ll look like the Iron man suit but if it pops on the ice then it pops.
(NEWSER) – A North Carolina teenager died one of the most horrific workplace deaths imaginable on his first day on the job. Mason Cox, 19, died on Saturday after being pulled feet-first into a wood chipper, police in Kings Mountain say.WSOC reports that co-workers who had been cutting down trees in a yard were so distressed by the sight of Cox’s body that they ran around ripping off their gloves and hats, causing neighbors to think that they were being attacked by bees. Police say John Crawford (some sources have him listed as Jon Crawford), the owner of Crawford’s Tree and Stump Grinding Service, was hospitalized after having a heart attack at the scene, the station reports.
Officials tell WRAL that Cox apparently became caught in the machine when he tried to kick a tree limb inside and his clothing snagged. Crawford, who has temporarily shut down the business, says Cox had been assigned a task considered safe for a beginner. “I’ve been in the business for 26 years. I’ve had one other accident where a person was injured. Mason Cox was working side by side with two experienced employees,” he tells WBTV, adding that he is grief-stricken over the incident. “I have not slept. I am sick from it,” he says. “I would trade places with that child right now.” Cox’s mother says she started screaming when she discovered how he died. “I loved him very much and I’m going to miss him very much,” she tells WBTV.
Brutal first day on the job for Mason, huh? Happens to the best of us really. Come in on the first day not making any friends, too scared to ask your boss to do anything and try to make it as long as you can before asking questions and looking like a fuck up but trying the best you can to make it till you clock out. I remember a friend of mine on their first day accidentally deleted the entire days record because he had no idea what the fuck to do and didn’t want to annoy people. Boom, all that money on the books just got cooked. Another friend of mine came in the first day hung over and dropped an entire pallet of milk because he was too much of a man to ask how to use the fork lift and tried to mop that shit up all before his managers lunch break ended. You know what that is? Its pride. Hubris beyond a reasonable level. Was it an idiot move to jam your foot down a wood chipper because a tree branch was stuck in it? Was it dumb to jam around fork lift controls like its a n64 controller? Yes. But at the end of the day theres a level of respect from me to know this kid had the balls to not show any signs of being a pussy and unsure of himself. He took a shot, and it obliterated him. RIP Mason, I’ll let the world know you didn’t go out a pussy, just, pride got the best of you.
NYDN- A Florida man tried clearing his guilty conscience with a dirty mind. The gunman killed Tarrie Wilder, 42, and then drove about 10 miles south to the Sugar Daddy’s Gentlemen Club on Nov. 13, police said. Cops said Rodney Chavers, 41, went to the strip club to get his mind off the murder, the Sun Sentinel reported. At the jiggle joint, Chavers handed off the weapon to a friend, who told cops he assumed it was because the gunman wanted to get a lap dance. After starting a fight, the pistol-packing perv was thrown out for bringing a gun, cops said. A group of men kindly gave him a lift home, but were in for a surprise. During the ride, Chavers pulled out the gun and told the driver and passengers he killed a man after Wilder punched him in the face, according to a police report. The driver, freaked out by what he had heard, pulled into a gas station after Chavers fell asleep, and called the cops. At about 5:20 a.m. on Nov. 14, cops found the creep snoozing with the gun on his lap. A forensic scientist determined the pistol was used to kill Wilder, according to reports. Chavers is charged with second-degree murder and is being held without bail. During his first court appearance on Tuesday morning, the alleged killer blew a kiss to the crowd, the Palm Beach Post reported.
I know people want to say he’s an idiot but can anyone really blame the guy? Going into a strip club sometimes is another world. Its like you’re in a weird drug high sometimes. Theres smoke everywhere, crazy purple lights and trance music playing. Titties everywhere. It puts you in a haze and i know i can’t think straight when I’m in one. Its like bar science where its a place designed to cloud every bit of judgement and make you spend hundreds. If I were to murder a guy, i probably wouldn’t mind getting in some weird high of a place like that. Honestly you can’t think about the murder you just did when a girls rubbing her nipples right in your face and whispering in your ear about needing more money so she’ll blow you for 100$ more. Its a huge distraction. Rodney Chavers here knows it and you know what? The strippers probably don’t care either, they just want the money. I mean look at that place? Sugar D’s at this point looks like a run down trap house being that small and ugly. You think they’re making headlines because they harbored a murderer for a few hours? Their regulars are all probably criminals. This isn’t Scarlett’s where they try to run a legit business or Madonnas where its the novelty strip club on South Beach, this is Sugar D’s, some no name titty bar in West Palm which probably has gone through a couple of raids for illegal shit in there annually.