It was a nice calm saturday today. Wanted to get fit so i went for like a 4 mile jog ( i walked like 3.9 and jogged the last .1 mile to avoid the neighbors dogs barking at me). I went out to Panera for lunch trying to get healthy with a salad when all of a sudden news broke of this mid in line ordering a Chicken Cobb with Avocado and i didn’t quite now how to react because i just feel mixed feelings about this and i haven’t seen any of the press yet about his plan or anything. I know other teams were pretty interested and he’s kind of the guy this off season but then again this is kind of like Philbin 2.0 just years younger. All i know is my first and only reaction right away was to order an entire baguette and im almost done eating said baguette. Tons of butter too. But a bigger recap when i get time to burn these carbs.
Well that was fast but also like 3 years over due. Hope the best of luck to where ever Philbin goes whether its a OC or DC job else where (any team would be dumb to put him at HC again) or maybe just moonlighting as a night time live musical performance at some run down bar. either way on to the next with Dan Campbell filling in for the rest of the season. Haven’t heard anything on Kevin Coyle yet though. His ass better go too.
Welp, Yesterday was fun huh? Losing 27-14 to a division rival. Start the morning completely miserable because all of a sudden all the hype going into the season about how this is a different Dolphins team is almost entirely diminished after the loss across the pond. Lets start with the obvious.
When I saw the video of Philbin dancing on stage singing that people should worry about the Dolphin coming to town i was almost sure They were gonna win almost all the away games. That you don’t just sing and dance to that with a baller suit and a top hat on with the utmost confidence for no reason. Well now Im thinking its more of a “Let me try to get the cool popular black kids to like me so they don’t give me a wedgie and a swirly in the locker room” type of move. Seriously I was almost getting worried his plain vanilla ass was gonna be stranded and marooned in London after yesterday. He can sing and dance all he wants and take the team to go see NWA biopics but if you suck at being a head coach and lead the team into another abysmal season your ass should get fired.
Kevin Coyle. Umass Amherst alum. He doesn’t know football. Defense has just looked worse and worse through the seasons. should definitely leave his ass in London.
Its time i think we start looking past Tannehill. Don’t hate the guy but he’s constantly on the boarder of being past mediocre but never seems to move past it and become a real franchise QB. Why? maybe because that boarder is an impenetrable roof that is his QB abilities. Maybe he can one day take over a game and actually lead his team to a win and playoffs but as of right now, with the way the offense looked, he no longer seems like he’s teetering on that line of being mediocre to franchise.
The big bad Ndamukong Suh. 114 million dollar bust. At first i thought his ass would be melting in the Florida sun and won’t accomplish a thing. But then i said to my self, black people don’t like the snow so maybe he’ll like playing in Florida. But then its 4 weeks later and he seems like a bust. No doubt it has to do with Coyle and confusing defense schemes but I also don’t like scum players and Suh is the top of the list. Oh and he might’ve tried to kick Fitzpatricks head off. Yea it looks accidental, but thats what happens when you have a laundry list of dirty penalties as your reputation.
So there you have it Dolphins stink in Florida, they stink in America, and they really stink in London. Hey NFL, really good job letting Florida teams being an ambassador of the sport. Dolphins now 1-2 in Wembley. and 1-5 for Florida teams. Maybe if we played in Spain we can rally with the spirits of Ponce De Leon but as for now we we slowly and depressingly march onward to Tennessee to face the Titans who has a rookie QB who I can absolutely see beating us. Hopefully though, someone’s on the chopping block this week (Kevin Coyle, Joe Philbin maybe but I kinda like him still from his on stage performance and i need that Philbin to blossom eventually.)
Side note- I wonder how Ponce De Leon would do a DC or HC? Having a 16th century Spanish Conquistador as a head coach or defensive coordinator can’t be that much worse than Kevin Coyle
Thats just Joe Philbin. The plainest vanilla ice cream white person ever. No toppings. Not adventurous enough for an Ice cream cone. Frankly my reaction right now is like a bowl of plain vanilla too. On one hand its shocking that in the past 30 years someone didn’t know who Dr. Dre was. On the other hand its Joe Philbin. Im not gonna mark this against him though because that was Pre-party Philbin. The Philbin who was on stage Friday night busting moves cutting up a rug on stage knows who Dr. Dre is and probably wants to party with him.
Who is this guy!? Joe Philbin just putting on a clinic on stage rocking out. Saturday preseason game against Carolina? Philbin ain’t got time for that, he probably has to go watch other summer blockbusters and sell out venues once that useless game ends. Memo to the rest of the NFL- You better lock up the back doors and run for your life when the Dolphins come to town!
**UPDATE** Im Offically on Philbin watch for the next 42 hours. Is he on a drug binge? Did he find out he has terminal cancer and doesnt give a fuck anymore? I dont know but im about to get an all white tux complete with a top hat and just link up with Joe and the rest of the Dolphins team and staff and party on the town maybe.
Love it. Nothing says confidence like taking the fellas out have a nice bonding experience and watch the hit biopic about the worlds most notorious rap group instead of doing boring walk throughs in a preseason game. Team bonding between coach and players. Yea Philbins about to enter his 4th season with the Dolphins trying to fight mediocrity. But just maybe Philbins gonna change up his coaching method and he knows this seasons gonna get past .500 mark. This isnt sarcasm either. Its me buying into Philbin in a last chance of desperation.
-It’s also just funny thinking about an old white guy in a theater packed with big NFL players, a majority of them being black.