Tag Archives: Maryland

The Poppy Seed Bagel Strikes Again

WSVN- TOWSON, Md. (AP) — A Maryland woman has discovered that eating a poppy seed bagel before giving birth carries serious consequences.
Elizabeth Eden told WBAL-TV in Baltimore she was in labor in April when a doctor told her she had tested positive for opiates. The test result meant Eden’s daughter had to stay in the hospital for five days while her mother was assigned a case worker.
Eden said she had learned in a school health class that eating poppy seeds could cause a false positive.
“I said, ‘Well, can you test me again? And I ate a poppy seed bagel this morning for breakfast,’ and [the doctor] said, ‘No, you’ve been reported to the state,’” Eden recalled to the news outlet.
After acknowledging the bagel defense, the case worker closed Eden’s file.
The Federal Institute for Risk Assessment writes that until food manufacturers reduce morphine levels in poppy seeds, it advises against excessive consumption, particularly during pregnancy.

How is it that in 2018, with all medical advancements in the world, so much technology implemented in the medical field, people are still falling victim to the Poppy Seed. Why the fuck are bagel shops still serving it on their menus? Why the fuck are people ordering them still? I don’t think I’ve ever had the inclination to order just a poppy seed bagel. They come on everything bagels but that’s because they play a small roll in every other flavor I’m tasting in my breakfast food. I can’t even describe what a poppy seed taste like off the top of my head so i don’t even understand why this lady would order one. Have people not seen the Seinfeld episode? They get stuck in your teeth and the flavor is probably so minuscule that the cream cheese or butter on the bagel just eviscerated the taste of it all together so you might as well just get a plain bagel and save your self the hassle of picking in between your teeth to get the small opium pods out.

Also ruthless on this doctors part to just report her to the state for being a reckless opium addicted mother to a newborn baby. Such an extreme result from a poor breakfast choice. Imagine the chain of events. You have a poppy seed bagel, hoping some how that’s enough nourishment for you, and the baby you’re carrying. Probably an hour or two later you go into labor. An 8+ hour struggle begins as you experience the pains of labor with nothing to eat but ice chips.  Finally in the 11th hour the birth is a success and you’re happy because you see the miracle of life for the first time and you’re so over whelmed with joy that your baby is alive and healthy. Exhausted from what people consider, the greatest joy in life, you take a small nap. Next thing you know you’re handcuffed to the hospital bed with 2 police officers on either side standing patrol to make sure you don’t escape. Doctors evaluating your drug habit and them leveling the decision to take your baby away because they don’t think you’re fit to be a mother. All from a poppy seed bagel. Wild.

P.s.- Remember 50 Cent’s song Baltimore Love Thing? Well that was about how Baltimore has the highest heroin user rate so there is a small chance Elizabeth Eden was on something

This Drugged Up Vagrant Doesn’t Give A Fuck About This Cops Tasering.

Published on Sep 4, 2015

I apologize for the angle of it . I NEVER would’ve expected it to escalate to that extent. Riverdale MD, Riverdale police handled this situation a lot better than other police would have in my opinion. Im amazed they didn’t shoot. **Backstory** : So about 4-8 mins before the police arrived , this man was inside the McDonalds located in Riverdale MD on Kenilwoth Ave. When I first noticed him, he was just talking to himself. After not paying attention to what he was saying, he began to bang on his table like if it were drums and was doing it a bit too loud. I had just assumed he was a person of special needs maybe and once agin, didn’t pay attention. He soon started punching his table like if it were a person and knew, he was becoming aggressive and an endangerment to the publics safety. My mom had asked an employee at this point if they had called the police and they had responded saying “yes, they’re en route.” He soon gets up and starts arguing with himself and acts like he wants to fight with someone who was in front of him and goes up against a wall and starts shouting. He takes off his shirt and starts walking around which endangers the public a lot more because we don’t know if he’s going to hurt someone because this man already seemed agitated. At this point he starts throwing chairs to the ground and slammed a wet floor sign to the ground and pushing chairs. McDonalds was pretty packed as well considering most people were getting out of work and school and there was quite a bit of children (including my 2 younger siblings) and a group of elderly people. When the police arrive, he was ordered on the ground and knew right there, to take out my phone and start recording. During the moment i had forgotten to turn my phone sideways which is why its at that angle so i do apologize for that. After he was detained, his legs were soon in cuffs and had a human muzzle it seemed like because he was still shouting and screaming. The ambulance arrived probably about 2 or 3 mins later after he was detained. He was then transported to a DC hospital. After all, he was tased 3 times, maced about 4 times, hit with the baton twice, tackled to the wall, and almost had his arm broken when being detained. Throughout the whole incident, this man showed NO sign of giving up and was resisting arrest. It seemed clear after being tased for the first time that this man WAS ON DRUGS. Most likely PCP. I commend the officers for stoping him before he could hurt someone and danger the public.

What’s the point of using and continually using a taser when you blast it at a bum and he just casually strolls around McDonalds with electricity coursing through his veins? Was theirs just broken? Is this man like Electro from Spider Man and just eats electricity for breakfast, lunch, and dinner? Honestly I think its just what happens when you’re that fine line of bum where you’ve slept on the streets enough times but haven’t just fully given up on life. Like he probably has a crappy den of a house but just shoots up on the streets to the point where the elements have numbed his nerves down so he can’t feel much physical pain. Obviously still has some meat on him, and not emaciated like a Holocaust victim. Like I said, that fine line of bum.  I mean the cop fired that thing point blank at him and he was still running around like a dog on a leash. That doesn’t work? Oh we’ll just wail on his leg with this nightstick while the tasers still running. Dude just scratches it off. They needed two freaking tasers and an ass kicking to kinda get him at least on the floor. They treated mace like it was hair spray and a little sting in his eyes. If it is just the drugs just fighting the pain then we need to modify that shit so that you’re not a crazy lunatic and just a drug that creates super soldiers that can take endless amounts of pain because thats whats going on for this guy.


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Love these 2 dudes just going at their food. Doesn’t matter if you’re white collar or blue collar. They just want nothing more than to get off work, enjoy their Bic Mac combo meal with a large fries maybe some McNuggets, and take in the live theater of watching a bum get arrested. Men of two different worlds, but men none the less who need their McDonalds.


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If I were in the drive through lane and saw this happen, I would ask the police officer if i could volunteer help by just running him over or just a nice strong love tap with the front bumper. It might be a cruel thing to do but you go through drive through to avoid the madness and judgement of others when you place an order large enough to feed a family all for yourself. Plus if im hungry than anyone in my path to satiation is fair game.