Category Archives: Uncategorized

Annual Summer Reminder that Florida has Beaches and Where there’s an Ocean there are Sharks.

Leave a reply

Last year 53 shark accidents? Barely Summer and we already have 8 with someone getting shark murked in Maui? Fuck all of that. Don’t give me the whole “Sharks attacks are rare” schpeel and then show me this.

Screen Shot 2015-06-01 at 6.58.12 PM

Theyre in fucking Droves! Sharks fucking rollin in crews ready to devour mother fuckers tossing your bloody limp ass around to his 5 other boys. And Every time I hear a New Smyrna Beach story it usually follows with the fact that there were a bunch of sharks in the shallow water. With enough evolution and time these guys are probably just gonna chill on the beach and walk on two legs. Steal all your girls and kill you at the same time. I dont mess with sharks. Got more teeth to grit and we’re asking to go into the fight with them having home field advantage. Beachs are out. AC buildings with netflix all summer.

 

Tampa Bay Lightning Shut out the Rangers 2-0 at MSG. Heading to the Stanley Cup Final

Leave a reply

Screen Shot 2015-06-01 at 6.34.07 PM

 

As a Panthers fan I hate seeing it but as a Florida person im glad to see the other Florida hockey team going to the finals by running though the Original Six none the less. Now i believed that Tampa was a good team from the beginning, but didn’t think they would be THAT good. Thought you would need more experience to even get that far but I can explain Tampa i think a bit

1.) TBs good but i think its also more of NYR have kinda not showed up much this playoffs. Most goals throughout the season but in the playoffs couldn’t lead by more than 1 goal the entire playoffs except for 2 games. Take all goals they scored all season and subtract all of Rick Nash’s cause he was transparent this whole playoffs, and you have a team that sits maybe 3rd or 4th in their respective standing. 

2.) Tampa had the better more effective defense 1 though 6.

3.) Rangers missing a top line player in Matt Zuccarello. Concussions are no fucking joke. Apparently he could remember how to speak for weeks after getting a puck to the head from his own Captain McDonaugh.

4.) Tampa bay has Russians on offense, those are scoring wizards, cant trust them on defense or as a captain at all but they do score a lot

5.) Ben Bishop is not a great goal tender but he’s fucking huge, Can’t get past him if he has his angles right. Gotta really play the wide surface of the ice with skill then he’s like the Grand Canyon.

6.) Henrik Lundqvist was given the options of good looks or Stanly cup, obvious which one he picked.

7.) I really like Detroit because of their history but they kinda prove you need good two way players (Not Ovechkin) because Datsyuk and Zetterberg are some of the best 2 way players in the world and they were the closest to cutting Tampa off because they eliminated Stamkos from the game. The ONLY goal Stamkos scored in detroit/lightning was the one second during a line change where Datsyuk was off the ice.

8.) Montreal was a pretty undisciplined team and russians suck at defense (looking at you, Emelin, you diving jabroni.)

9.) Its the Scotty Bowman effect. Anything he touches turns to gold. Taught Yzerman how to put together a winning team.

10.) Gods asking me to go to a Finals game in Tampa.

11.)Tyler Johnson. kids 5’9 and started out undrafted. NHL teams have kinda always overlooked the small guys and just now you’re seeing smaller guys like a kane or a Johnny gaudreau become scoring machines. Must be like an optical illusion on the ice with their size. Tyler Johnson pretty much was a younger Marty St. Louis with out the calf muscle weight of a charging bull and now Marty got himself traded to NY while his former team in Tampa is going to the finals.

12.) On that same note NY media just i think just drives players crazy. 3 lightning players were Rangers last year including their former captain and now they’re blossoming. like 3/5 New York knicks got traded to the Cavs are in the NBA finals now. Playing in NY is a battle of attrition from being a big city target and the NY media wearing you down. 

13.) Gary Bettmans trying to make it Tampa/Ducks to expand hockey in warm weather states. Arizona is bound for a cup run and the Rangers, Kings, and Blackhawks traded their future to them. Arizona’s gonna make a run for the cup within the next 8 years, book it.

Thats all I got. Stanley Cup Final starts on Wednesday with Tampa having early home Ice advantage.

You’re TV show must suck if it was bad enough to make the Pope give up TV forever.

Leave a reply
(NEWSER) – If the Vatican has a water cooler, Pope Francis is decidedly not the guy spouting off Monday morning about last night's Game of Thrones: As NBC News reports via an extensive interview with Argentina's La Voz del Pueblo, the pontiff says he hasn't watched the boob tube since the night of July 15, 1990, when he decided

(NEWSER) – If the Vatican has a water cooler, Pope Francis is decidedly not the guy spouting off Monday morning about last night’s Game of Thrones: As NBC News reports via an extensive interview with Argentina’s La Voz del Pueblo, the pontiff says he hasn’t watched the boob tube since the night of July 15, 1990, when he decided “it’s not for me” and vowed to not watch anymore. That vow comes at the cost of not watching his beloved San Lorenzo soccer team; but Francis says one of his Swiss guards gives him the low-down on the latest scores and standings.
Two things he does miss since becoming pope: “The tranquility of walking the streets. Or going to a pizzeria to eat a good pizza.” Surely, his interviewer asks, the Vatican could score delivery? “Yes,” he says, “but it’s not the same.”

Can you imagine that? One day you’re scrolling though the channels maybe even scrolling through Netflix and you find a show thats so god damn awful that it just pushes you over the edge and decide not to watch TV anymore. ANYMORE. Poor Pope Francis never got to fully experience Seinfeld, Arrested Development, Breaking Bad, All of HBO’s premium programming. Gave it all up in the 90’s when Technology and television were about to fucking change the world’s productivity rate. And most of all his beloved San Lorenzo soccer team. Why not give up TV except for all your favorite sports team? Let me give you an out, Pope Francis. You throw all of your support and readership into this Florida based blog and I’ll officially become the Western most San Lorenzo F.C based blogger out there. Want a little taste of what thats like? You got it.

SAN LORENZO TOPS QUILMES. DOMINATES PRIMERA A WITH 31 POINTS.

Screen Shot 2015-06-01 at 5.56.30 PM Screen Shot 2015-06-01 at 6.02.24 PM

San Lorenzo tops Quilmes 2-1. Beautiful goals by Hector Villalba and Waler Benitez! 2 yellow cards for Villalba and Mercier. Next match they soccer with those losers Belgrano on Saturday and im predicting 3-1 with 2 soccer goals from Cauteruccio! Book it!

There you go, Pope. There’s plenty more of that sweet soccer Futbol action if you put your support behind me. Go San Lorenzo!

p.s- I went on IMDB to find out what show sucked that much. After looking at IMDB’s top shows of the 90’s, the only thing i could find (the first thing i could find because i didnt want to look anymore) that matched that date was “In Living Color- Season 1, Ep. 11” The 6.6 Rating speaks for itself. Screen Shot 2015-06-01 at 5.48.41 PM

 

P.P.S- I would miss having pizza too. Don’t know what slices of Argentinian pizzas are like but a nice tranquil walk along the beach staring at all the latina chicks in thongs on the beach grabbing a quick slice and a cold drink on a hot summer day sounds like something i would miss too.

People aren’t happy with a Radio DJ who murdered a Rabbit live on air.

Leave a reply

(NEWSER) – A Danish radio DJ chose a controversial way of drawing attention to what he sees as the flawed debate over animal welfare: He hit a 9-week-old rabbit named Allan three times with an iron bicycle pump while on the air Monday, then wrung its neck. Later, Asger Juhl of Radio24syv ate it for dinner. Angry listeners have since called for a boycott of the station, and much worse for Juhl himself, reports the BBC. "I did it to show the hypocrisy in the debate," he says. "Many people are outraged by what I did, at the same time many of these people will eat meat. And when they eat meat, an animal will die." Juhl says he consulted with Aalborg Zoo on a humane way to kill rabbits and was told it used an "iron stick." The zookeeper "hits several baby rabbits every week [to feed] the snakes," Juhl explains, per the Local. His employer is unapologetic. The New York Times quotes station editor-in-chief Jorgen Ramskov as saying the rabbit "was taken good care of, it had a nice life, and it was killed in a decent way." Animals endure "horrific suffering on their way to our dinner tables … without it invoking any strong reactions or calls for boycott," a station rep tells Sky News. Perhaps fueling the outcry on social media, per the Times: The station posted two videos on its Facebook page: a 20-second clip showing Juhl cradling and petting a very-alive Allan, and a 10-second clip showing what the station described as pieces of Allan, cooking in a pan. Those two parts are important, argued the station in a Facebook post yesterday. "We knew that we would be accused of provocation. But it is not an empty provocation; the presenters of the program ate the animal after killing it." (It's not the first controversial animal killing in Denmark.)

(NEWSER) – A Danish radio DJ chose a controversial way of drawing attention to what he sees as the flawed debate over animal welfare: He hit a 9-week-old rabbit named Allan three times with an iron bicycle pump while on the air Monday, then wrung its neck. Later, Asger Juhl of Radio24syv ate it for dinner. Angry listeners have since called for a boycott of the station, and much worse for Juhl himself, reports the BBC. “I did it to show the hypocrisy in the debate,” he says. “Many people are outraged by what I did, at the same time many of these people will eat meat. And when they eat meat, an animal will die.” Juhl says he consulted with Aalborg Zoo on a humane way to kill rabbits and was told it used an “iron stick.” The zookeeper “hits several baby rabbits every week [to feed] the snakes,” Juhl explains, per the Local.
His employer is unapologetic. The New York Times quotes station editor-in-chief Jorgen Ramskov as saying the rabbit “was taken good care of, it had a nice life, and it was killed in a decent way.” Animals endure “horrific suffering on their way to our dinner tables … without it invoking any strong reactions or calls for boycott,” a station rep tells Sky News. Perhaps fueling the outcry on social media, per the Times: The station posted two videos on its Facebook page: a 20-second clip showing Juhl cradling and petting a very-alive Allan, and a 10-second clip showing what the station described as pieces of Allan, cooking in a pan. Those two parts are important, argued the station in a Facebook post yesterday. “We knew that we would be accused of provocation. But it is not an empty provocation; the presenters of the program ate the animal after killing it.” (It’s not the first controversial animal killing in Denmark.)

When i turn on Power 96 in the morning i want to hear some shitty hip hop song to see what the kids are listening to these days. What i dont want to hear is a god damn 3 month old bunny’s death rattle. Listen i get your argument, Asger Juhl. Animals die to make food on the table. The difference is im not murdering them. Some one else does the dirty deed and I in return pay them for having their blood on their hands. And what the fuck is with the bike pump? I wanna say the idea is to pump air until their kinda high? Part of me thinks he inflated the rabbit’s insides until they dont work anymore? I dont know and thats why i dont go around killing rabbits on live air. Kinda think he shoulda just hit it in the head when the poor guy wasnt looking. Hope that rabbit dinner was good, Asger. Cause one day that image of the poor bunny’s eyes glossing over is gonna eat away at your soul probably.

Does this look like the Face of a woman who beat up her boyfriend then bribed the arresting officer to not arrest her if she licked his asshole.

Leave a reply

A woman accused of assaulting her boyfriend was allegedly willing to do anything to avoid arrest, even lick an officer's butt. Diane Thomas, 52, was arrested on May 16, accused of punching her live-in boyfriend in the face “multiple times” and scratching him with her fingernails, The Smoking Gun reports. Thomas, of Monroe, Lousiana, admitted to the assault but blamed the victim, saying, “He (was) a bitch and got in her face, so she beat his ass,” a police report obtained by the website alleges. When Thomas realized she was being collared, she tried to get officers to reconsider, explaining that "she had a good job," according to the incident report. Her pleas didn't work, so she allegedly offered to "lick [the officer's] butt hole," as Complex.com indelicately quoted from the arrest report. Officers didn't take up Thomas' butt bribe. Instead, they charged her with public bribery as well as a misdemeanor domestic abuse charge, according to The Smoking Gun. Thomas has since been freed from the Ouachita Correctional Center on $5,000 bond.

A woman accused of assaulting her boyfriend was allegedly willing to do anything to avoid arrest, even lick an officer’s butt.
Diane Thomas, 52, was arrested on May 16, accused of punching her live-in boyfriend in the face “multiple times” and scratching him with her fingernails, The Smoking Gun reports.
Thomas, of Monroe, Lousiana, admitted to the assault but blamed the victim, saying, “He (was) a bitch and got in her face, so she beat his ass,” a police report obtained by the website alleges.
When Thomas realized she was being collared, she tried to get officers to reconsider, explaining that “she had a good job,” according to the incident report.
Her pleas didn’t work, so she allegedly offered to “lick [the officer’s] butt hole,” as Complex.com indelicately quoted from the arrest report.
Officers didn’t take up Thomas’ butt bribe. Instead, they charged her with public bribery as well as a misdemeanor domestic abuse charge, according to The Smoking Gun.
Thomas has since been freed from the Ouachita Correctional Center on $5,000 bond.

Asshole licking is the first thing she jumped to? Is that like whats hot in the streets? Im feeling like a pretty big square right now. I mean I figure a blowjob is the standard so i figured she’d offer to blow him. If that doesn’t work then you leverage full sex and then the ace in your sleeve has to be anal but she went with ass licking first? Maybe she sized him up right there and knew getting his ass licked was his thing? Hey Diane Thomas, learn how to bribe better. Ass hole licking, i assume, doesnt do much for me. Make the offer more appealing to get me interested and then wait for my counter offer. Would it have work? I dont know but you’re the one who went to jail and that was the best offer you put up so i think it would’ve. Maybe if you want to protect your sweet job so much maybe learn from your mistake and bribe your boss with something that will make him actually cum. Also how about the boyfriend getting his ass whopped by an asshole licker? that guy’s a flat out loser.

As If All the Plane Crash Stories Recently Weren’t Enough, Apparently You can Hack Into Planes and Fly It into Sideways Pretty Much

Leave a reply
(NEWSER) – The FBI's new best friend is Chris Roberts, a man variously described as a computer security expert and hacker, who made headlines last month after United Airlines booted him from a flight over a tweet. Roberts, the founder of One World Labs, has been interviewed by the FBI at least three times this year, and as APTN News reports, during one of those conversations in February, told an agent that he'd briefly hacked control of an airplane via its in-flight entertainment. Per the FBI search warrant application, via Wired: "He stated that he thereby caused one of the airplane engines to climb resulting in a lateral or sideways movement of the plane during one of these flights. He also stated that he used Vortex software after comprising/exploiting or ‘hacking’ the airplane’s networks. He used the software to monitor traffic from the cockpit system." Roberts' alleged method is disturbingly simple: Vulnerable planes had Seat Electronic Boxes, installed under seats two to a row. Roberts removed the cover, and as Wired puts it: "attached a Cat6 ethernet cable, with a modified connector, to the box and to his laptop and then used default IDs and passwords to gain access." Once there, he was able to access other systems. Roberts further told agents that he'd accessed in-flight networks on various flights about 15 times and that he was able "to monitor traffic from the cockpit system." He identified Boeing 737-800s, 737-900s, and 757-200s, and Airbus A-320s as vulnerable. Roberts tells Wired: "I’m obviously concerned those (conversations) were held behind closed doors and apparently they’re no longer behind closed doors."

(NEWSER) – The FBI’s new best friend is Chris Roberts, a man variously described as a computer security expert and hacker, who made headlines last month after United Airlines booted him from a flight over a tweet. Roberts, the founder of One World Labs, has been interviewed by the FBI at least three times this year, and as APTN News reports, during one of those conversations in February, told an agent that he’d briefly hacked control of an airplane via its in-flight entertainment. Per the FBI search warrant application, via Wired: “He stated that he thereby caused one of the airplane engines to climb resulting in a lateral or sideways movement of the plane during one of these flights. He also stated that he used Vortex software after comprising/exploiting or ‘hacking’ the airplane’s networks. He used the software to monitor traffic from the cockpit system.”
Roberts’ alleged method is disturbingly simple: Vulnerable planes had Seat Electronic Boxes, installed under seats two to a row. Roberts removed the cover, and as Wired puts it: “attached a Cat6 ethernet cable, with a modified connector, to the box and to his laptop and then used default IDs and passwords to gain access.” Once there, he was able to access other systems. Roberts further told agents that he’d accessed in-flight networks on various flights about 15 times and that he was able “to monitor traffic from the cockpit system.” He identified Boeing 737-800s, 737-900s, and 757-200s, and Airbus A-320s as vulnerable. Roberts tells Wired: “I’m obviously concerned those (conversations) were held behind closed doors and apparently they’re no longer behind closed doors.”

I seriously might never get on a plane ever again. Today half my family is flying to Thailand for a fucking wedding and when they asked if i was going i pretty much said No and said my last goodbyes. Asia has had more issues with plans in the past year than we’ve ever had and you still want to go there? Fine, put me in your will and you have my blessings to go all you want. Bet they’re thinking “those are just rogue kamikaze pilots that crashed the plane by locking everyone out of the cock pits, Ill keep an eye on the doors, we’ll be fine”. Nope. this mother fucker fiddled around under his seat for a few minutes and then hacked that shit as easy as it is to hook up a N64 pretty much. And we’re not just talking  observing flight controls and reading system gauges or whatever. He made that shit go side ways. Guy probably could fuck around and ditch all our cargo mid flight if he wanted. And you know whats sick is the default ID and password he used to hack in, im willing to bet was just “User ID: Admin” and “Password: Password” Boom. You’ve been hacked, and now you’re all screaming to your deaths sideways.

The Most Distinctive Cause of Death in Florida is HIV

Leave a reply
Florida: Human immunodeficiency virus. (15563 deaths) Via- Washignton Post

Florida: Human immunodeficiency virus. (15563 deaths)
Via- Washignton Post

Well fuck. I guess at some point statistically i might have HIV in my life time. Heres the fucked up thing, Yea all those college party cities are bound to have STDs. Tally, Gainesville, Orlando, Miami. Walk on campus and throw a rock and you’ll hit someone who probably has some STD. might not be HIV, maybe just syphilis and definitely have herpes of some sort. Either way, college towns are expected to have some STDs lurking in prominent places. Fort Lauderdale though is the mix of College kids who 50% chance have herpes, and the left behind people that never went anywhere after high school and instead got a bar job with an abusive ex boyfriend probably that now 75% chance gives them aids or something. Probably cant even go to church here any more with out finding a girl who got the germ. Statistically i think Im probably gonna get HIV and I know for a fact that im not having nearly enough sex to potentially catch an STD.

Florida, man. If its not betting your face eaten or getting bricked to death by some meth addict then you’re definitely gonna die of HIV.

Rangers beat the Lightning, Force Game 7 ECF at MSG

Leave a reply

Screen Shot 2015-05-27 at 11.42.33 AM

Talk about an incredible series. Started the eastern conference final slow but damn did things pick up. Heading in to the series i thought it was gonna be Tampa in 5. Rangers couldn’t win by more than 1 goal, Rick Nash had no production, had to go to 7 to take out the Caps. Detroit had the highest chance to take out Tampa. Datsyuk played great two way hockey and the entire team kept Tampa bays scoring in a cage by boxing out Stamkos. After that they pretty much steam rolled Montreal. I mean yea it went to 6 but it never really seemed close at all. Now here we are, game 7 at MSG. Want to give the edge to Tampa but something about Henrik and game 7’s at home make that seem like the way to go. Not to mention I never liked Bishop. Not the best goal tender in the Eastern conference playoffs. Next to Mrazek in Detroit they might be the worst. Frankly i don’t know what i should do with Tampa. Do i root for them because they’re florida and making Hockey relevant in the South? I mean they dont REALLY embrace the whole I-75 rivalry of Panthers Lightning anywhere. Gonna go with my gut and go with New York. They’ve won like 9 out of 10 Game 7’s at home (I might’ve botched that stat but roll with it), They aint losing. Tampa can get lost, Its the Florida Panthers time to shine soon enough in the Sunshine State. Friday night at 8, tune in and watch Tampa lose as the Rangers make their return to the Stanley Cup Finals again.

Taco Bell and Pizza Hut Are Removing All Artificial flavor and coloring.

Leave a reply
Taco Bell and Pizza Hut are the latest brands to commit to a menu redo as they phase out artificial ingredients this year. Taco Bell's nacho cheese no longer will be colored with yellow No. 6 as the chain plans to get rid of artificial flavors and colors by the end of the year. Pizza Hut is booting fake coloring and flavors from almost all pizzas except a few local offerings by the end of July. Both chains are owned by Yum Brands (YUM). Pizza Hut has been working toward the change for the past year, the company said Tuesday, redeveloping products so that flavor wouldn't be compromised. "Today's consumer more than ever before wants to understand the ingredients that make up the foods that they enjoy," Pizza Hut CEO David Gibbs said in a company statement.

Taco Bell and Pizza Hut are the latest brands to commit to a menu redo as they phase out artificial ingredients this year.
Taco Bell’s nacho cheese no longer will be colored with yellow No. 6 as the chain plans to get rid of artificial flavors and colors by the end of the year. Pizza Hut is booting fake coloring and flavors from almost all pizzas except a few local offerings by the end of July. Both chains are owned by Yum Brands (YUM).
Pizza Hut has been working toward the change for the past year, the company said Tuesday, redeveloping products so that flavor wouldn’t be compromised.
“Today’s consumer more than ever before wants to understand the ingredients that make up the foods that they enjoy,” Pizza Hut CEO David Gibbs said in a company statement.

Well what the fuck, Taco bell? Here i am sining your praises about selling booze and now you’re changing 95% of your menu. Who the hell are these assholes saying they want to know whats in their food? Theres a fine line you gotta draw and thats between “Food” and “Fast Food”. Maybe when im at a 5 Michelin Star restaurant where im paying a mortgage I want to know whats in my food. But this is Fast Food we’re talking about.Theres absolutely no way you’re gonna give me some grass fed beef or anything in my taco so why put on this front. Oh so now that you use pepper instead of pepper flavoring? Is that suppose to be healthier on my 88% real beef?  Bet it doesn’t really now does it. You guys better start serving booze at all locations nationwide if you want me to put up with all your changes.

Apparently Cod Jizz is the Hottest Foody Trend in Japan right now.

Leave a reply
HP- Right now, fishing boats are pulling Pacific cod from the Bering Sea and Gulf of Alaska. According to the North Pacific Fishery Management Council's guidelines, fishermen are allowed to catch up to 325,000 tons of cod this year. A lot of that cod will become fish sticks or batter-fried filets. But many processors in Alaska also remove the sperm sacs of male cod, a seafood product called cod milt. In Japan, a high-end market exists for cod milt, which goes by the unsettlingly literal name shirako, or "white children." Virtually unknown in the U.S. outside certain bold Epicurean circles, the male counterpart to caviar is a delicacy in Japan, where it is tempura-fried, dipped in ponzu sauce or served in hot pot soup dishes typically enjoyed in winter months, according to Akiko Yakata, the Alaska Seafood Marketing Institute's representative in Japan.

HP- Right now, fishing boats are pulling Pacific cod from the Bering Sea and Gulf of Alaska. According to the North Pacific Fishery Management Council’s guidelines, fishermen are allowed to catch up to 325,000 tons of cod this year.
A lot of that cod will become fish sticks or batter-fried filets.
But many processors in Alaska also remove the sperm sacs of male cod, a seafood product called cod milt. In Japan, a high-end market exists for cod milt, which goes by the unsettlingly literal name shirako, or “white children.”
Virtually unknown in the U.S. outside certain bold Epicurean circles, the male counterpart to caviar is a delicacy in Japan, where it is tempura-fried, dipped in ponzu sauce or served in hot pot soup dishes typically enjoyed in winter months, according to Akiko Yakata, the Alaska Seafood Marketing Institute’s representative in Japan.

Well this post is pretty unsettling to write after lunch. I mean im sure no ones surprised by this move. Rich japanese men are assholes when it comes to food. Can’t chill out with wings and fries, gotta be something weird and elitist. Oh everyones eating all the blue fin tuna? Give me whale meat. Thats not hot anymore? give me fish cum. Not only that but im gonna call it “White children.” Do Japs want to maybe produce white children? or is it some mental symbolic way to getting revenge for that whole bombing of hiroshima thing? Either way i dont want any part of this action that probably cost a gazillion yen. I like the 7 dollar cream cheese rolls at Publix better anyways.