Tag Archives: Elaine Benes

Oregon Man Pulls The Classic Elaine Benes, “My Breakfast Had Poppy Seeds!” Defense In Court

PORTLAND, Ore. (AP) — An attorney for a man who pleaded guilty to a conspiracy charge in the takeover of an Oregon wildlife refuge says his client tested positive for morphine because he ate an ‘everything’ bagel with poppy seeds.
The Oregonian/Oregon Lives reported Monday (http://bit.ly/2eIZoQd ) that a federal judge in Portland, Oregon has ordered Jason Blomgren to avoid poppy seeds in addition to drugs.
Blomgren took a plea deal for his role in the armed occupation of the Malheur National Wildlife Refuge last year and is expected to be sentenced to probation next month.
He had been subpoenaed by the government to testify in a trial against Ammon Bundy and other leaders of the refuge occupation, but was not called as a witness.
Blomgren now says he will eat egg whites for breakfast.

The classic Poppy seed bagel/muffin defense. This is one of those things that is a known fact that might not be true at all. It’s like when you growing up you heard that red cars raises your car insurance. Nothing to show that it’s a true solid fact in life. Your insurance broker can even tell you that that’s a myth but you still probably factor it into the cost of potentially picking out a new car. Well poppy seeds are the same. As a kid you’d get your morning everything bagel and then tell your friends “yo, the bagel i’m eating has poppy seeds in it. You know if I get drug tested It’ll come up positive because of the Poppy Seeds?!?! It’s like I’m doing drugs.” Everyone has heard that once in their life and if not you know of the Seinfeld reference. And Just like this judge who had to hear this testimony in court, he believed it. Maybe not fully believed it but like “c’mon guy, We know you did a ton of morphine and deserve to go to jail or whatever” but then that small chance that the elusive poppy seed rumor is true, you don’t want to the one to make the mistake of not believing a fact that everyone on the planet universally knows. Let this be a note to all Morphine addicts and the defense attorneys that represent them. Oregon vs Jason Blomgren has set a legal precedent that makes a client’s drug toxicity report inadmissible in court  based on the defense’s breakfast choice. Basically converting myth into legal grounds at this point. Very important moment in US history.

P.s- Saying you’lll switch from Poppy seed bagels to Egg White’s is a great move. If he said he was just having eggs the Judge would probably dismiss that as an act to gain his trust, you mention it’s egg whites only it makes him seem like a health conscious citizen. The devil’s in the details.