FORT LAUDERDALE — Step aside, Burmese python — you may no longer be Florida’s scariest invasive species.
Researchers have confirmed that three Nile crocodiles were captured near Miami, and they say it’s possible more of the man-eating reptiles are still out there, although no one can say for sure.
The big question now: How did they get to Florida?
“They didn’t swim from Africa,” University of Florida herpetologist Kenneth Krysko said. “But we really don’t know how they got into the wild.”

I love it. Here I am thinking Florida can’t get anymore dangerous or bizarre but some way we make things even more absurd. He we are just at the hanging piece of turn clinging to America’s asshole hot as hell on the brink of summer which means 100 degree weather. We have all kinds of bizarre drug news, shootings, we got hurricanes that ravage the lives of the people living here. Sea levels are supposedly rising at an abundant rate that’s suppose to kill us all in years. And now we have some rich dumb fuck probably releasing dangerous violent cousins of American alligators, an already dangerous, vicious, prehistoric reptile. Love it. Its like we recognize the joke about us and we’re just layering it even more and more until people cant think of a joke that fits all our stereotypes anymore. Soon enough we’re gonna have Polar bears roaming south beach amidst news of some rival drug cartel/race/sexual orientation related murder or something 2016 can’t really even comprehend. Its almost why this blog exist. Give me your weirdest.